Search:

How to Approach Women

To start with, let's give you my tried and tested 'Approaching Checklist'

1. Have a conversation starter ready to go.
2. Focus on 'being social' rather than trying to pick up.
3. Don't 'apologize' for standing there, by means of your body language, voice tone or conversation.
4. Assume that the woman will be attracted and interested in you (this makes you appear more confident, which is attractive).
5. Ensure that you are using all the right mindsets for the situation.
6. Make sure you start conversations without having a 'Whoa you're hot!' look on your face.
7. Be composed and charming when you start conversations, rather than eager or clown-like.
8. Ensure that you are displaying confident and relaxed body language.
9. Convey good status.
10. During the first bit of eye contact you make with a woman, she should be the one to look away first.

Next, let's look at 'Creating Your Own Conversation Starters'

My favorite conversation starter is "Hey, I thought I'd come over and say hi - I'm Dan, what's your name?" and it will serve you well in most environments.

However, maybe you'd like to prepare to meet women in other, more specific environments. If so, here is an exercise to accelerate your progress.

Okay, do yourself a big favour and stop reading for 5 minutes to do this exercise. Grab a pen and paper/open a new file on your PC or technology device.

1. Places: Write down headings like Supermarket, Bookstore, Bar, Club, Take-away store, Walking along the street, Friend's party, Laundromat, Pedestrian traffic lights, Public transport. Add more if you can think of them.

2. Situations: Under each heading, note down situations you often see women in at these places. For example: Situations in a bookstore may include reading a book, flicking through a magazine, in line at the counter, in the romance section, having a coffee, etc.

3. Statements: For each of the situations you identify, write down at least 3 different statements you could make to start an interaction.

Example statement for bookstore with a magazine section: "Magazines... so many to choose from! I like GQ magazine and Adbusters. What are you reading?"

4. Questions: For each of the situations you identify, write down at least 3 different questions you could make to start an interaction.

Example statement for bookstore with a magazine section: "Hey...what's your favorite magazine?"

More tips on using the conversation starters for approaching women:

- Take some time to rehearse saying each of your statements. You might even want to try it while looking in a mirror so you can work on your body language at the same time.
- Include pauses and changes in your tonality to add genuine character and feeling to what you are saying.
- If you're stuck thinking of statements to make, pay close attention to the various statements you make when talking with friends.
- If you have enough self-discipline to complete this simple exercise properly, you will arm yourself with the confidence to approach women and start an interaction in all of the common situations you find yourself in.
- If you don't prepare, you will mostly likely stall and miss out on the many opportunities that come your way. Your choice!